The War on Aging

We all want to look good as we age, and hopefully younger than our real age. We all know that good nutrition and regular exercise are required if we want to look and feel our best. But the war on aging does not end there. There are sorts of procedures and ideas which can help erase or slow the march of time. However, I think the struggle to look young can take the fun out of life.

It certainly does when you consider some of the things some women are doing in the hope of looking young.  Some celebrities swear that a cleanse makes them feel younger while others are rumored to rely on the wacky. Case in point, some use bird poop facials! Not just any poop mind you, nightingale droppings. Poop, really? I prefer to look my age, thank you.

Of course, celebrities of all stripes have always been obsessed with looking young. In the old days, some actresses were known to use carefully concealed surgical tape for a homemade facelift. Today, of course, the anti-aging industry has become big business, and face lifts are often replaced with less invasive solutions such as laser treatments or fillers. And, of course, there are many so-called miracles cures and pills on the market which treat aging not as a natural process, but rather as an illness.

Today’s baby boomers want to grow older in a more elegant fashion than their parents did which no doubt accounts for hair color being such big business today. Men with gray hair are perceived as looking distinguished, while women rush to hide gray as soon as it makes it appearance because they feel that men judge them for getting older. Yet men see older women like Helen Mirren and Judi Dench as projecting confidence about their looks. Like most European women, the goal is to look well, rather than young, for one’s age, which means more time to relish and enjoy life.

We all know Joan Rivers went under the knife a few times to fight aging. While her face looks somewhat contorted as a result, I must say that while she is now 80, she does not look it. Of course, the professional makeup and the expensive clothes do help, but it’s her sense of humor about aging that keeps her as a favorite among comedians. She is not afraid to say it like it is. Recently, she was describing that she was so nervous before an appearance that she had to change her diaper. She was not ashamed to say it like it is: older women often have bladder control problem.

Accepting that the war on aging is full of subtle battles we can’t win will prevent what I consider “aging anxiety” from intruding into our lives and looks. A sure way to project style as we age.

 

Grandparents Day

Mark your calendar. Grandparents Day is coming. Founded by Marian McQuade of West Virginia to entice grandchildren to tap into the wisdom of their grandparents, it gained momentum when President Jimmy Carter proclaimed in 1978 that Grandparents Day would be celebrated the first Sunday after Labor Day which this year will be September 8^th.

Mothers Day and Fathers Day are well advertised and celebrated. Why has Grandparents Day been almost forgotten? Maybe we, grandparents, are partially to blame. Why don’t we make sure our children know about the day so that families can get together to mark the occasion and the grandkids can listen to stories from the past. I know my grandchildren are always fascinated when I recount how things were when I was young (in my case when dinosaurs roamed the earth!). Seeing how things have changed over the years, it makes them aware that they too will see changes they can’t even begin to fathom at the moment.

Grandparents Day should be a day of celebration in all families, but unfortunately it is not. As we all know, many grandparents do not have access to their grandchildren for a variety of reasons. It’s a terrible injustice, except of course in rare exceptions where the grandparents may be a bad influence on the young ones. For the others, it is no doubt a day they prefer to forget. There are several organizations which help grandparents reconnect with their grandchildren, but being open to discussing frankly with adult children/in-laws the source of the problem is not without its merit.   

A cousin of mine can certainly attest to that. She decided she had enough after being barred from seeing her three young granddaughters because of her son had died. She decided she would no longer deprive her grandchildren of the benefits of having a grandmother in their lives. She called her daughter-in-law and made her case. Both women were deeply hurting because of the death, and it took more than one discussion, but today my cousin spends time with her grandchildren at least twice a month.

Luckily for all of us, hope springs eternal!