Joy All Around

Christmas is almost here, and there’s joy all around. It’s time for family and friends, for gifts and for laughter and for smiles.

I wish all my readers the best of life and the joy of the season.

I am taking a few weeks off, and will be back in January.

Our Future

Some folks still hang on to the idea that climate change is not real, just something cooked up by naysayers. Such a denial should worry all of us because the predictions of the scientific community are dire indeed if we continue in our current path. One consequence will certainly be an increase in numbers and intensity of natural disasters. After a year where disasters killed so many people and caused so much damage all around the world, we can no longer afford to ignore the warnings if we want a future.

            For example, I don’t think we can afford to continue being a throw-away society. Recently, my washing machine stopped working. When a repairman came he easily found the problem: an accumulation of lint in the pump which was easily cleaned. My machine is more than 25 years old, and the repairman told me he seldom sees machines that age because they last a long time. He says that what he sees now is the newer models that are not as well built. Newer is not necessarily better.

            In my neighborhood there was a fellow who repaired electronics. Some years ago he repaired my VCR (remember those?). He is now retired and when I saw him recently he said he was sad that few people repair their television sets today. They prefer to buy something new with the latest innovation in picture and sound. So more garbage is being generated! Do we really need to have the latest product as soon as it comes out? And where does it end?

            When one of my aunts moved into a retirement apartment from her home, she told me that the thing she missed most was her clothesline. She had hung her clothes outside all her life and had a difficult time adjusting to only using a clothes dryer. I understood because I have been using a clothesline most of my life. There’s nothing like the smell of clothes dried outside.

            I am hopeful that the young generation coming after us might turn things around. They are certainly trying. My granddaughters hang their washed clothes on folding expandable racks that can be used in the house as well as outside.. They do it because it is easier on their garments than tumbling then in a machine, but also because it helps the environment. Imagine if everyone did this how much energy we would save!

            Another point for the younger generation is that many of them are vegetarians. It’s no secret that meat production accounts for some 2/3 of the greenhouse gas emissions, and the millennials have taken notice. Because of reduced red meat consumption in North America, there has been a steep decline in the number of beef cattle, a trend which will surely continue. In a few years, this is bound to have an effect on the environment and hopefully prevent an increase in natural disasters.

To Sleep or Not to Sleep

As the years pile up, sleep patterns can become disturbed. The reasons for this state of affairs are as varied as there are people. For some it’s recurring pain, for others it could be worry and stress, medication or depression. The list goes on and on.

            The point is that being unable to sleep at times just proves that we are human. The question then becomes: what are you supposed to do about it? Or rather, with it?

            My sister tells me that every so often she spends the whole night awake and is terribly tired the next day. While I believe she may be awake for part of the night, she probably dozes off for some time here and there without realizing it. She turns on the TV in her bedroom and watches infomercials until it’s time to get up, but I am of the opinion that she sleeps through many of them. In any event, having a television set in the bedroom is not a good idea because we may be tempted to watch movies late at night, movies that may keep us on the edge of our seat – rather our bed – making it hard to fall asleep afterwards.

Lack of sleep is no laughing matter, and a doctor should be consulted if it is the norm rather than the exception. You might simply need more exercise, and an after-dinner walk can do wonders for the body. Or your spouse may be a loud snorer or a restless sleeper and thus affect your own sleep. Discuss the problem with him or her.

A friend who eats dinner early says she often wakes up during the night because of hunger. The solution seems simple to me: eating a little something before bed can be helpful to counteract the problem.

            Because we often become light sleepers as we age, outside sounds such as an airplane, a loud car or thunder can wake us up without our realizing exactly the cause of the problem. To counteract such things, some people use earplugs, but I doubt that everyone would be comfortable wearing them to bed. 

            Another problem is suffering from insomnia when traveling. Many people cannot sleep, or at least sleep soundly, when in a bed other than their own often because the mattress is much softer or harder than the one they are used to. For some, sleeping on a foam cushion on top of the mattress solves the problems.

            It is certain that we all get used to our own space, no matter the age. I live in the city, and two of my grandchildren live in the country. When visiting me one weekend, my grandson was unable to sleep. It was a warm spring night and I had opened the window to let in fresh air, but my grandson complained that the people talking as they walked on the sidewalk made it hard for him to fall asleep. He is used to complete silence, something I find difficult to adjust to when I visit his family. The total silence prevents me from falling asleep quickly. 

            Some of the reasons we do not sleep well can be remedied once we become aware of what they are, i.e. the mattress, the snorer nearby, etc. However, you may have a sleep disorder if most of the time you have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep; or you wake up not feeling rested and need to take a nap during the day. A sleep disorder should be discussed with a doctor. We all need our sleep, and can only be our best when we are rested no matter our age.

Hidden Losses

We all must cope with various losses over the span of a lifetime. Some are relatively minor while some are life-changing, but always grieving properly is a primordial need.

When someone passes away, relatives get support from those around while social rituals facilitate the mourning process. But how to cope when the loss is on-going and doesn’t result in a funeral and in tears shared with family and friends? Yet, such a loss can be as devastating as the death of a dear one.

A friend is undergoing such a loss after her son was diagnosed with a serious mental disorder. The family unit has been shaken to its very foundation, and she and her family are having trouble coping. They can`t mourn publicly and they are not receiving social support because so many people feel somewhat awkward discussing mental illness so they simply avoid the subject totally.

Meanwhile the family is suffering the full impact of the many stages of the losses in their lives, from facing the pain of seeing their child suffer to their own pain of a diminished future. It`s a heavy burden.

Whatever the time of year, we should all see the importance of discussing mental problems. It`s more than time for all of us to let go of old prejudices and acknowledge that mental disorders are no more shameful than physical ones. Simply different. We all rally around those suffering through medical procedures and treatments, so why not do the same for families facing diseases of the mind?

 

Alzheimer Awareness

November is Alzheimer Awareness month. Those of us who have a relative fighting the disease know only too well how devastating it can be, not only for the person suffering but for those around him or her.

     Memory impairment and Alzheimer are increasing at an alarming rate. Now 1 in 8 seniors is affected while the disease’s early onset, i.e. before the age of 65, is appearing more frequently.

          We are all aware of the steps we need to take to lessen the risk of dementia—keeping mentally active certainly heads the list. We all know that that our minds are capable of learning new things even in very old age, yet some people think that once they reach a certain age, there is no need to learn or try anything new. In my view they are letting life pass them by and at the same time not helping their future. There is lots of information available on line or at local libraries on how to lessen the risks of dementia and Alzheimer.

Recognizing the signs of dementia in those around us is also very important. A few years ago, a close relative began having some problems and many everyday tasks were not properly attended to which to me was indicative of Alzheimer. Other family members simply dismissed my worries because they were convinced (or convinced themselves) that there was nothing wrong with her. I have often wondered if they simply refused to accept a very painful reality.

I was proven right when a police officer called in the middle of the night to say that my relative needed care. She had called the police several times because the wind was too loud!

This month is a good time to watch out for unusual behavior. Burying one’s head in the sand does not stop or alter anything. Experience has taught me that those who are affected with dementia should be diagnosed early so they can benefit from treatment and care.

Power of the Mind

The connection between body and mind is very fascinating and has always intrigued me. The more I read about it, the more I am convinced that in our efforts to lead healthy lives the power of the mind must be part of the picture.

            Take for example placebos which have health benefits in spite of having no scientific merit. Some people have seen symptoms disappear when taking sugar pills simply because they had been told that they would be cured. And the mind believed it.

            I read recently about a man who was taking part in a trial for a new antidepressant. After a fight with his girlfriend he decided to kill himself and took all the pills he had been given. Soon feeling ill he was taken to the hospital where he collapsed. All tests proved negative, and when doctors contacted the organizers of the study it turned out that the man had attempted to kill himself with sugar pills. Of course the man recovered rapidly.

            A very strong case for the power of the mind is certainly voodoo. Some people who believe in the power of voodoo have been known to die because they were certain that they had been cursed. Powerful, wouldn’t you agree?

            The subconscious mind accepts what the conscious assumes is true. To me that means that we are in control and that we can choose how we react in all aspects of our lives. We can overcome fear by affirming the good which the mind will accept as truth. When faced with health challenges, we can certainly lead our subconscious mind to expect a positive outcome.

            I believe that in many ways we are masters of our own fate. We can make up our minds to be powerless or we can make positive thinking a habit, it’s that simple. The mind will accept whatever message we sent its way.

#ME TOO

These days the rallying cry for women who have been sexually harassed or assaulted by men is #MeToo, and the movement is steadily gaining momentum. This, of course, follows the revelations about the behaviour of Harvey Weinstein, and other executives in high profile companies.

            It’s about time, I say. I myself was the victim of men who used their power to demean women in the workplace. I never said anything because I felt totally powerless, somewhat ashamed as if it were my fault. Of course, if this happened to me today I can assure you that two men who made my life miserable would be cooling their heels in prison.

 As many of you will remember, some decades back, men sexually harassing women was the worst kept secret in large corporations. Women didn’t dare say anything for fear of losing their jobs especially when the economic situation was dismal. Thank God, things are changing and women are finally speaking out. The #MeToo movement is certainly showing that there is strength in numbers.

Being sexually assaulted by men is more than a mere social faux pas. It has been proven that for women it is a devastating life event that can lead to post traumatic stress disorder with varying degrees of anxiety and long-term depression.

I believe that we of a certain age have a duty to encourage our granddaughters and all younger women around us to be aware that some men do prey on women and that these men should immediately be reported. This should be a lot easier now that #MeToo women are banning together to lift the stigma of shame women who were sexually assaulted in the past had to endure. Women have a right to be heard no matter what.

Years ago, my mother and my aunts joined other women who fought for women’s rights and they were successful. Today, the #MeToo movement is another milestone in women’s fight to be respected.

As far as I am concerned I don’t need to worry too much about a granddaughter who told me that if a man ever tried to touch her or insulted her, he would be the recipient of punch in the face.

Go Girl!

             

           

Tragedy

Albert Schweitzer said: “The tragedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives.” And that means an awful lot of people by the look of all those who are sad and depressed, or bitching all the time about what is wrong with the world.

            I think that what dies is a willingness to see the possibilities of life, no matter our age. Of course, with age we face certain physical challenges that at times surprise us. And doctors are quick to prescribe meds for whatever assails the human body, but I often wonder if there is not a need to increase awareness that the mind and the soul also need care. 

            With age we face losses of all sorts, from being away from children and grandchildren who are making the most of life far away to coming to terms with thinning hair. Our attitude to those changes is all important as far as I am concerned. It’s a question of whether we see the glass half full, or the glass half empty. With the many means of communication available today, keeping in touch with children and grandchildren is easy, no matter where they choose to live. As for thinning hair, we can make up our minds to be proud of it or find ways to take advantage of the many options on the market to mask it in some way.

            It’s only a matter of seeing the silver lining.

            My 92-year-old brother-in-law has never ceased to see life’s possibilities. He still enjoys golf three times a week because “at my club everything is free for those over 90.” Now, that’s the right attitude if I ever heard one.

            When I was younger, I did enjoy meeting people for happy hour, however today happy hour is a nap!  Still enjoyable.

            As the years pile on, we know that life is not tied with a bow, but those who see how great a gift it is can prove Schweitzer wrong.

Alternative Medicine

I believe that, at times, alternative medicine can work wonders as an adjunct to traditional treatments. For example, I have used acupuncture very successfully to eliminate severe pain caused by neuralgia. Traditional medicine could only offer painkillers which were not the permanent solution that acupuncture proved to be. Many people who suffer from arthritis look to acupuncture to relieve their pain for several weeks at a time instead of taking traditional painkillers on an ongoing basis.

I am the first to admit that not all alternative therapies are worth considering. Case in point, we hear more and more about the benefits of drinking “liquid gold” i.e. one’s urine. Its proponents, or urophagists (the technical term for urine drinkers), say that traces of substances that cause illness are secreted through urine and that when these are reintroduced into the body antibodies are produced to fight the problem.  Proponents add that urine drinking eliminates the need for medication or surgery, yet people in China and India have been drinking liquid gold for centuries and have not eliminated the need for medical attention.

          Although it is said that urine is safe to consume unless someone has an infection I think I’ll stick to tea. It has a lower grossness factor.

When it comes to alternative therapies, I think we should all make certain we fully understand how they work. I don’t think I would object to beer baths now the rage in spas in some parts of Europe. The idea is that beer rejuvenates the skin while soothing muscles and joints to reduce the use of traditional painkillers. However, I would think twice before getting maggot debridement therapy although it has surfaced because of antibiotic-resistant bacteria. It is reported that maggots can actually dissolve infected tissue where antibiotics have proven useless. Who knows? This might one day replace antibiotic treatments.

And leech therapy used for blood detoxification is being hailed by some celebrities as having rejuvenating properties. Perhaps that’s true, but once after swimming in a lake I was covered with leeches when I got out. I can testify to the fact that having to pull them out one after the other negated any possible positive effect, in my mind at least!

My Best Friend’s Gift

Spencer was my best friend for over 12 years. He was a darling Old English Sheepdog who was always glad to see me and never criticized unlike some people I know. While he has gone to his reward and is enjoying dog heaven he left many great memories behind. One of the great benefits of my relationship with him is that I walked morning and night for at least an hour each day, whether it was raining or the sun was shining, whether the weather was exceedingly hot or miserably cold. And that is something I continue to do each day, every day. It’s now part of who I am and I owe it all to Spencer. (Of course, now on really miserable days I drive to my local mall to walk.)

            Having a dog forces you to walk. You can’t escape it, no matter the size of your best friend. In my walks along the lake where I live, I see all sorts and sizes of dogs. Some are so huge that they could almost be classified as small horses, while others are so small, you can hardly see the body at the end of the leash. Sometimes I can’t avoid a second look like when I see a middle-aged woman who often pushes her hairy little animal in a baby stroller as she walks merrily along. Perhaps her dog is old or unable to walk long distances. I don’t know the story and I can hardly stop to ask her about it, can I? Well, one of these days I may do just that. 

            No matter what the dog looks like, I find that all owners seem very happy to walk along with their best friend. Walking is good for whatever ails you. I find that walking relieves any stress I may be feeling about issues in my life. They somehow become clearer and not as daunting.

            Walking is also good for the body, we all know we have to exercise to stay healthy. Experts who have studied the habits of people in various countries say that the data is clear. The people who live the longest are those in countries where taking 11,000 steps a day is the norm rather than the exception.

            To see how many steps you take in a day, you can purchase a pedometer and train to increase your level of activity or you can get a dog. It will force you to get out and get going every day.

While owning a dog is good for the body it also provides a friendship that does the soul good.

Thanks but No Thanks

At some point everyone over 50 decides that it’s time to downsize. The reasons vary, but often it’s when boomers come to the realization that their living space is much too large after the children have (finally, in some cases) left the nest. And they wonder why they have so much stuff. Time spent caring for that stuff could be better utilized elsewhere.

            Many of us don’t just accumulate, we collect. Case in point, I love things made of copper. Over the years, I regularly added to my collection whenever something made of copper caught my attention. The end result was a rather large eclectic assortment of interesting pieces, but of little use except for a few select pans. One day, prior to a move, I realized that, like it or not, I had to trim it. After I ascertained that my children had absolutely no interest in getting any of the pieces (Thanks, Mom, but no thanks), I got rid of my collection gradually, keeping only a few favourites. It felt good and it cleared a lot of space in my kitchen where it was displayed.

            One other thing I have accumulated over the years is books. I love to read, and I held on to most of those books until, that is, one day I realized that apart from a few, a lot of them were outdated because research is ever expanding. Fiction ones, except for the more classic titles, of course, were also dated. It was time to do something. After a bit of research I found an organization that ships books to Third World countries, and it made me happy to donate of lot of my books to them. Today, I exchange books within a group of friends, so I have stopped accumulating.

            I found it interesting that my children, and yours as well I’m sure, seem to have little desire in getting any of old “stuff”. Tastes change over the generations, and while many of us were proud to wash our exquisite “Sunday” plates by hand, our children only want dishes that can be loaded into the dishwasher. Please, Mom, no washing by hand! And certainly nothing that needs to be polished.

            So what to do with our silver, china, etc? Sell them ourselves or contact antique dealers because while our children say: Thanks, but no thanks, there are many collectors of all stripes out there, and the cycle can be renewed.

DARN GRAVITY

A few days ago I heard an acquaintance comment that while she used to have a nice figure, her boobs are now hopelessly sagging. “Soon they’ll be at my waist!”

            Gravity is relentless. It’s always pulling us down as if afraid we might fly away. When we’re young, it’s nothing to worry about. However, when gravity has been at work for a few decades, results begin appearing. While our noses and earlobes elongate throughout our lifetimes due to gravity that also seems to be the case when it comes to women’s breasts. Like many other minor irritations, us ladies must simply learn to live with that reality.

            But what about all the young women who, in summer, proudly display the tattoos that seem to sprout when light clothing is the norm. What will happen to the cute little butterflies or pretty roses now adorning their décolletage when gravity wins the battle, as it always does? If nothing else, it’ll be interesting, don’t you think? I see lovely little butterflies expanding downward to, no doubt, look like they had a mishap of some sort. 

            And what about all the other works of tattoo artists on the arms and legs of so many people, men and women, these days. I wonder what will happen to the designs when some elasticity is lost or when limbs become either fatter or skinnier with age. Today’s snake design the artist spent so much time perfecting might need some artistic makeover, don’t you think?

            I never explored the possibility of tattoos for myself. A good thing since I have enough problems with gravity as it is without having sagging art adding to the confusion.

Aging Memory

It has been my experience that one common fear people over 50 have is that they will suffer from dementia, perhaps even early-onset Alzheimer’s disease. Of course, many of us are aware of someone who is battling the dreaded disease, often someone close to us, so it is natural to wonder if we will also suffer the same fate.

          Since people are living longer, the statistics seem to be dire. However, all is not lost. While memory undergoes subtle changes with age, there are many things that can be done to keep our brains healthy. It is not unusual to forget simple things like the reason we came into a room or the name of our neighbor’s dog. My friend Barb calls those brain farts. Colorful word but rather accurate, don’t you think, since we do remember a moment later.

          If we forget where we parked the car in the large lot of a mall, we may be tempted to think we’ve really lost it, but that happens to people of all ages. In the days when cars had actual radio antennae, people put a flag or other colorful aid on it so a car could be found easily. Of course, since the car antenna today is mostly invisible within the glass of the windshield that option has gone out the door although we can use our remote keypad as a guide.

          Experts say that it’s important to pay attention to simple things that may be causing less than perfect memory, and which we can remedied.

<    -- Fatigue: when the body if tired, memory is not as sharp.

<    -- Absentmindedness: thinking about half a dozen things at the same time the mind is not as focused.

<    -- Grieving: the loss of a loved one can play havoc with our intellectual ability for a time.

<    --- Depression: when the mind sees only the dark side of life, memory can become clouded.

<    -- Medication: some medication can lower our level of perception.

<    -- Alcohol: excessive drinking can perturb the way the brain works and lead to short-term memory loss.

      -- Stress and anxiety: they keep attention focused on only one aspect of our lives and can make us forget things we normally would not.

    It’s important to get the help we need when we need it to keep the brain and memory sharp.

Butterflies

While I don’t consider myself a lepidopterist like those who make the study of butterflies their vocation, butterflies inspire me. The wall in front of the desk in my home office displays an array of butterflies of various colors, sizes, materials and details. I like butterflies not only because of their beauty and colors, but because they remind me that although they begin life as crawling insects they metamorphose into elegant flyers. They remind me that anything is possible, at any stage of life if we are willing to transform our views and ideas.

Some people believe that those they loved and have passed often appear as butterflies. They see butterflies as messengers connected to the spiritual world to bring comfort in times of grief. Of course, no one can actually prove such a thing, but that does not alter the belief of so many people with touching stories to tell about butterflies. We all need to know that there is a grand life on the other side, and those who believe in the role of butterflies find comfort in being shown that their loved ones are in a better place.

I certainly accept the possibility. After all, there are so many mysterious things in this world, and one certainly does not have to be a scientist to appreciate that fact. As Albert Einstein said: “The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science.”  

We live in a world of mysteries that humans are forever attempting to understand. Sometimes, it is reassuring to simply accept the mysterious without attempting to decipher it.

ABOUT LABELING

While traveling by car recently, I was half listening to talk radio. I perked up however when the announcer who was discussing a local incident referred to a 66-year-old woman as elderly. The remark made me scream: What!

            From the sound of his voice, I was certain the man was young and of the opinion that anyone over 50 is disgustingly old. I couldn’t blame him too loudly because I remembered that I felt the same way at some point. When my dad passed away at the age of 55, I was 14. Relatives and friends all seemed to make the same remark: He was so young! I couldn’t understand that. To me, he was simply old.

            But then life happened and my perspective changed. I suppose it’s the same for everyone, and that young announcer will surely realize one day soon that not everyone over the age of 65 is elderly, and that being a senior does not necessary mean being elderly. If a 66-year-old is elderly, what do you call a person in their 90s? I say Young at Heart.

            Anyway, why is it that we feel to need to categorize age. Some people are children, some are adolescents, and the rest are adults. And if we mention a person’s age, there is certainly no need to qualify it. Some people are old at 40, while others in their 70s are full of joy, vitality and optimism.

            In my view, labeling people for whatever reason can be misleading. For example, I object to hearing the label “women’s issues.” Shouldn’t they be people issues? After all, whatever affects women, also affects the family, the community, the workplace, etc. To me, the moniker women’s issues simply perpetuates men’s long-held social attitude of the not-so-distant past that being female means being somewhat apart, inferior in some way.

            It’s the same for age. By qualifying a person’s age, we detract from the essence of the person. In fact, we declare that that person is somewhat inferior in some way. As people get on in age, they may face physical issues that slow them down, but they are still simply adults who have acquired wisdom and enrich all other adults.

             

           

Summer Light

It’s summer. Time to relax and enjoy life. Is there any better way than by laughing? Looking over the e-mails I got lately, I’ve decided to share some that made me smile.

                          
Civilization in 2017-  
Our Phones - Wireless 
Cooking - Fireless 
Cars - Keyless 
Food – Fatless 
Leaders  - Shameless  
Relationships - Meaningless                      
Feelings -  Heartless 
Children – Mannerless 
We are-SPEECHLESS 
Government-is CLUELESS 
And our Politicians-are WORTHLESS! 
 I'm scared – S*#&less

Summer is short. Enjoy it!

On Gratitude

Recently, as I was walking down the street to a restaurant with my handsome blond grandson, I pointed out that he might have liked to be out enjoying the evening with a younger person on his arm to which he replied: “I’m very proud to be walking with you, Grandma.” My heart was touched, and I realized how fortunate I am.

            Appreciating and being grateful for the nice moments of life is something we simply forget from time to time. I certainly do.

            Of course, it is difficult to be grateful when we are facing serious disappointments and coping with an array of challenges. It is especially difficult when we or family members are dealing with health issues. One good thing about dark days, they don’t last forever and the sun does come out again. My own road so far may not always have been a bed of roses, but today my grandchildren are a great source of joy and love. Who could ask for more as age speeds along!

            An active man, now in his 90s, whom I admire a great deal, says he is grateful for every birthday. To him, old age is a privilege that many are denied. Indeed! He always reminds me to be grateful for the many blessings in my life even if I cannot turn back the clock although I wish I could. Everyone does, I suppose.

            The old poem Desiderata says it well: “Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.” Perhaps we are not always very graceful in that quest, but appreciating our everyday blessings makes the transition that much easier.

            With experience behind us we realize that life is far from being always fair. Dark clouds often hang around, sometimes for a long time. I always try to remember what one of my aunts always said: Smile. It could be worse.

            Recently I had reason to recall that she was right. When I got back home after grocery shopping, I realized that somewhere along the way I had lost a block of cheese I was certain I had packed in my reusable shopping bag at the store. I remembered having put the bag down on the sidewalk while I grabbed another bag from the car. Perhaps it had fallen then. I can’t be sure, of course. I never found the cheese when I went back to look for it. It could be worse, I told myself. Many people cannot afford proper nourishment, and I hoped that whoever found it needed it.  

            These days, I am very grateful for the arrival of summer with its long, lazy days. I plan to make the most of the season, so I am taking a few weeks away from my blog for travels, for visits, and all that great weather has to offer. I’ll be back in August.

            Have a great summer!

           

Amazing

A while back my grandson’s iPod went through the wash cycle and no longer worked. Someone had told him that putting it in rice would fix the problem, so I buried the device in rice. Since his parents were not home, I thought it would be wise to put an explanatory note on the container.

To tell you the truth, I didn’t expect much. I mean, how could a grain as ancient as rice be of any help to such a modern device. But lo and behold, it was. A week later my grandson was proud to tell me that his device was again working properly. I find that totally amazing. Don’t you?

The creativity of mankind is as old as time. Modern gadgets result in modern problems, but somehow we are able to find adequate solutions. Perhaps that was the idea from the start. A “let’s see how long it takes them to figure it out” sort of approach by the Universe. I believe we have all the solutions. The trick is to be able to fit them to the right questions. And that’s what researchers are attempting to do all the time no matter their field of study.

Sometimes, answers and discoveries come up totally by accident, which is the case for some of the prescribed medications now available. Some doctors say that we don’t need any more drugs, that we have more than we require. They contend that what needs to be done is to tweak those we have already so each one can be appropriate for more than the one condition it targets. 

Make sense to me. If rice can be used to draw humidity from inside a modern electronic gadget and revive it, surely the same principle can be applied to countless elements in our world. All we need is to nurture our ability to be amazed.

 

 

All About Age

Recent statistics indicate that the number of people reaching 100 is ever increasing. What used to be a rare milestone is now not quite as exceptional. That indicates to me that we all have the capacity to live a century or more. Advances in medical treatments and care are certainly important components of this phenomenon, but there are other factors certainly.

The older I get, the more I see that a positive attitude seems to pay unmistakable dividends. A relative who was getting close to 102 commented that she never looked back. In her view, what’s past is past. No point thinking about it or wonder what could have been different, she said. She concentrated on making the best of today. Wise words. As Irving Berlin is reported to have said, “Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it.”

Of course, each stage along the road of life has its own challenges, but they don’t need to be taken too seriously. George Burns had the right idea when he said, “When I was young, the Dead Sea was still alive.” He always looked at age at something to be laughed at rather than a source of angst. Of course, if one’s age is cause of concern, the secret might be to simply disregard birthdays. Or lie about them as a friend has done much of her adult life. Now, at times, she truly forgets how old she really is. All I know is that she has been celebrating her 50^th birthday for a number of years now!

For my part, I became keenly aware recently that we’re all in the same boat. When I saw a picture of an old colleague in the paper I was surprised to see that he seemed to be aging much more slowly than me although we’re the same age. Then, when I happened to see him at a social event, the black hair so apparent in the photo was now nearly white! It reminded me of a remark from the youngster who asked his grandmother why only grandfathers have grey hair, not grandmothers. The answer is simple. Grandfathers are simply not as friendly with color in a bottle!

 

 

Thoughts and the Universe

We are certainly not alone in the Universe. I believe there is a force, a collective consciousness, that unites all of us. I find that such a force might become stronger as we age.

 Case in point: I had an unusual house plant that I had been enjoying for more than a decade. One morning as I got up I had a strong feeling that I should sell that plant. I dismissed the idea as simply the residue of a dream. However, as I went on with my day, the idea that I had to sell the plant came back into my mind several times, each time a little bit stronger. By noon, I gave in and advertised the plant online. I got an almost immediate reply and lo and behold one hour later a fellow was at my door so pleased at having finally found the plant he had been seeking.

            As he left with the plant I felt that somehow this was the way things had to unfold. He had no doubt put out a strong vibe as he searched for the plant, and somehow that vibe found me. Amazingly, I have not missed the plant.

            Many what might be termed unusual occurrences occur often, but I think that we simply dismiss them. For example, we don’t pay much attention to such things as that while thinking of someone, that person calls, or we know before picking up the phone who is calling – without having seen the name display. Some say that the reason is that we are all subconsciously aware of higher level vibrations. After all, we all know that not all communication is actually is heard or seen.

            A couple of years back, when I woke up one morning I knew I had to call an old aunt who was living in an assisted living environment. When I did I learned that she had passed in her sleep and that attendants had found her a short time earlier. I visited her as often as I could, and perhaps she put out a vibe to let me know right away that she was gone.

            I don’t think such things are just random occurrences. I believe that at our higher self we entwine through our thoughts with those around us especially those we care about. As long as we are open to it, of course.

We’re a Changin’

It’s no secret that as we age, changes occur. I’m not talking about physical changes, but rather about the way we react to life. 

For one thing, we no longer worry, or even think, about how other people are judging us. That happens when we come to realize that people have their own worries so they have little time to think about what we may be doing or not doing. There are always exceptions, of course. Case in point, those who sit on their verandas and balconies trying to decipher what neighbors and passersby might be into. Or comment on what they are wearing. I’ve always failed to understand such an amazing disinterest in more meaningful life interests.

Clothes are important to women throughout their lives. It is said that women dress for men or other women, not for themselves. Perhaps it’s true, but one thing is certain, there comes a time in every woman’s life when she gives up trying to impress and chooses comfort. For example, she realizes that wearing four- or five- inch heels (even three-inch ones for that matter) doesn’t impress anyone while it is a serious danger to the health of her back. A bright smile is a much better way to impress someone. And from there things change gradually.

We women, and men too, cease to see the need to wear tight belts when apparel manufacturers have been kind enough to make elastic waistbands. We take to wearing comfy sports shoes when we go walking or shopping instead of the regular shoes—that we now wear only when it’s an absolute must—because we realize that no one ever looks at our feet, just like we rarely notice what type of shoes others are wearing. And because age appreciates comfort wherever it can find it.

Those who went camping over the years, give it up with age—not necessarily old age— for the more pleasurable comfort of sleeping on a proper mattress. We appreciate the comfort of having more leisurely meals now that the kids are out carving their way into the world. And we appreciate doing our own thing.

A grandmother in her eighties wrote to an advice column because her daughter had told her that wearing a long dress to her granddaughter’s wedding was inappropriate for an afternoon wedding. The grandmother said she liked the dress very much and didn’t want to splurge on something new. The columnist replied simply: Wear the dress. You have earned that right.

That’s how I feel. We, of a certain age, have earned the right to do what makes us feel good and comfortable. Let the others think what they want if they have nothing better to do with their time!   

Food for Thought

For the last few years I have been suffering from early spring allergies, with this season seemingly worse. When chatting with some people I know who also suffer they all agreed that this season is worse for them as well. Then, a few days ago I saw a doctor being interviewed about allergies who confirmed that this year, sufferers are more affected than in the past and that it is bound to get worse.

            Great! was my reaction. The good doctor said that one of the main reasons was climate change which is affecting vegetation.  So, if humanity does not wake up to the fact that we are in trouble what will happen to the young people now facing many decades of allergies ahead of them? And all the other problems that will continue to creep up?

            I find it rather amazing that some people still believe that all the talk about climate change is simply not true. Some governments are even deciding to reverse on-going policies and actions that are helping our ecosystem get healthier. I simply don’t understand why these decisions makers feel that it will be beneficial for the world, including their own children and grandchildren. Don’t they see that the price we are already paying today will gradually get more and more exorbitant? Some experts are predicting that the floods and hurricanes we are seeing now are nothing compared to what we can expect in the future if we don’t shape up.  It’s more than time to speak up and let our elected officials know what we really want and really need.

            I have not loss all hope, however. I see how the younger generation is seriously involved in doing their part to improve our future.  All five of my grandchildren are avid proponents of the three Rs, much to my delight.  Two of them are vegetarians.  Even as teens, they decided that red meat was not only a poor food choice, but that it contributed greatly to global warming because of the methane cattle emit.  According to experts methane is twenty times more potent at trapping heat from the sun than carbon dioxide.  By unit, it is the most destructive of the greenhouse gases. To me that means that curbing our taste for red meat would help stop climate change.

I am also among those who deplore the fact that fields used to feed cows could be used to grow real food. A lot of “food” for thought here, don’t you think?

 
Spring is Springing

Every year I find it quite amazing how fast spring springs. Just a few weeks ago we had snow that, fortunately, quickly melted. That gave way to what I call the brown season, the dull almost lifeless look of nature before the sun has a chance to warm things up. That was certainly the case last week as I drove in the country with my granddaughter. She remarked that she couldn’t wait to see green. She got her wish this week as, almost overnight, lawns were once again revived and showing off their green blades. Close to my house the dark red shoots of the peonies are seemingly growing an inch a day as they rush to be able to show off their large blooms. And the buds on the trees are bursting at the seam.

All that newness entices us to spring into action. We have a need to take stock, to change, to once again put our best foot forward. As with most people, at this time of year I clean out my closets. The main idea, of course, is to put warmer things in the back and bring lighter clothes to the front, but it’s also decision time. Because most of us keep buying new clothes every year, spring is a good time to thin the herd as it were—but what to keep and what to recycle? I don’t know about you, but I always have problems deciding what to eliminate. Some little devil somewhere inside me says things like: Keep that; it still looks good. Or: Don’t get rid of that; styles do come back. Or: You’ve got to keep that jacket; remember how much you paid for it?

The problem with listening to your little devil is that you end up with too much. Yesterday I tried on a skirt I purchased some ten years ago. It still fits because my weight hasn’t varied much in that time, but I soon realized that the cut dates it even if I feel comfortable in it. It was difficult, but I faced my little devil and the skirt went into the recycle pile. And the pile grew as I found many things I haven’t worn for a couple of years for one reason or another.

It is said that if you have clothes you haven’t worn in more than a year, you should get rid of it. I suppose that’s a good habit to take, but like everything else in life there are exceptions to every rule. Take a dressy top I bought in Hong Kong ages ago that I only wear on special occasions. When I see it I agree with my little devil that I should definitely keep it, no matter its age. The cut is classic and I can enjoy wearing for many more years.  No one needs to know its real age. Nor mine for that matter!

Have a great spring!

I’ll be away from my blog for the next couple of weeks.

The Earth is Mad

On April 22 the world marked Earth Day. Most of us did something to show that we care that the earth is in trouble. We may feel that our actions are of little consequence, but if everyone did something, the results could be significant. 

Earth Day had a modest beginning in 1970 when U.S. Senator Gaylord Nelson from Wisconsin invited students to implement projects to sensitize their communities to the needs of the environment. Since then, the warnings from scientists have become more dire as our actions have brought us closer to a point of irreversibility. But there is reason to be optimistic because we are changing our ways and becoming more engaged in our efforts to heal the earth. I can certainly see that in my grandchildren. Being green is now second nature to them.

However, when you make that comment to older folks, they are proud to point out that they were green before it became a fashionable modern-day virtue. I remember that my mother who sewed a lot of our clothes kept all the remnants and when there was enough she would braid them and make beautiful rugs displaying an array of gorgeous colors. Braided rugs are still available of course, but they are now made by machine and the yarns dyed to make symmetric patterns. I don’t think they have the same soul!

In the old days, little was thrown away. However, with after-war posterity life changed. Like most of you, I remember a time when cars were long and pink and gas was selling for about 35 cents a gallon. So we fell in love with automobiles not thinking about their growing impact on the air we breathe. Fortunately, we are getting back to basics after decades of spending our resources without much thought to how it was affecting the environment, but a lot remains to be done. 

Each of us should get involved in “greening” our world beyond the weekly recycling of household trash. We should be involved in our respective communities and putting pressure on decision makers so that economic development does not come before environmental protection. There certainly is no doubt that climate change is now a reality. Floods, hurricanes, drought and earthquakes seem to be the norm everywhere. We’ve always had those, of course, but now it seems that they occur more often because the earth is rebelling, or as my grandson puts it: “The earth is mad?”

The earth is not only mad, it is fuming. We have abused it and it is rebelling and telling us to clean up our act. Yet there are still people who believe the whole climate change is just a sham made up by scientists. But what is most upsetting to me is that some elected officials are rolling back ecological standards. Everyone should be up in arms about this and let it be known that voters are ready to rebel to save our poor planet. 

People like my grandmother and my mother did so much for the earth as a matter of course. Nature was respected and little was thrown away. For those who lived through the Great Depression reusing and recycling was second nature. Clothing was mended and hung on a line outside to dry, appliances repaired, not discarded like they are today in our throw-away society. Families had one car, not two. How things have changed! We may have a better lifestyle overall but at a cost.

It seems to me that if everyone was an environmentalist and did their share, the world could be a better place for our grandchildren who may have to pay a high price if we continue to ignore the earth’s message. If we don’t, I fear that the earth will remain “mad” and the future may indeed be bleak for them. Every day should Earth Day.

 

 

Faces

We see many faces as we go about the business of living. The faces of those near and dear to us could never be forgotten. The same goes for the people we deal with on a more or less regular basis like doctors, dentists, and so on. My dentist works behind a mask that looks like the lower half of a cartoon cat’s face. Not easy to forget.

But every day we see the faces of people we recognize but whose names we don’t know. The cashier at the grocery store who always greets you with a smile, the bank employee who goes out of his way to make certain all your questions are answered. In their environment, we have no problem figuring who they are. However, if we see these people outside their work place, it may take a second or two to figure out who they are. They are after all nameless faces

When I worked full time, I commuted downtown by train. I always rode the same train in the morning and in the evening. Not being a morning person, I was often late and I would rush to make it to the station before the train. The engineer would wave at me as I ran through the open space behind the houses in our neighborhood and he slowed down so I could make it to the station. In the evening, as I walked back home, he would briefly use the train’s whistle as he waved at me. This went on for a number of years.

One day, I went home at noon for some reason. As I was making my way through the downtown station to catch the midday train, I saw a man walking towards me, a smile on his face. I knew I knew the face, but for a second or two I could not place it. Then it dawned on me. I said: “I’m sorry. I didn’t recognize you without your train.” He laughed for a long time. After that, he seemed to laugh again as he waved from the train, no doubt my inane remark still echoing.