The War on Aging

We all want to look good as we age, and hopefully younger than our real age. We all know that good nutrition and regular exercise are required if we want to look and feel our best. But the war on aging does not end there. There are sorts of procedures and ideas which can help erase or slow the march of time. However, I think the struggle to look young can take the fun out of life.

It certainly does when you consider some of the things some women are doing in the hope of looking young.  Some celebrities swear that a cleanse makes them feel younger while others are rumored to rely on the wacky. Case in point, some use bird poop facials! Not just any poop mind you, nightingale droppings. Poop, really? I prefer to look my age, thank you.

Of course, celebrities of all stripes have always been obsessed with looking young. In the old days, some actresses were known to use carefully concealed surgical tape for a homemade facelift. Today, of course, the anti-aging industry has become big business, and face lifts are often replaced with less invasive solutions such as laser treatments or fillers. And, of course, there are many so-called miracles cures and pills on the market which treat aging not as a natural process, but rather as an illness.

Today’s boomers want to grow older in a more elegant fashion than their parents did which no doubt accounts for hair color being such big business today. Men with gray hair are perceived as looking distinguished, while women rush to hide gray as soon as it makes it appearance because they feel that men judge them for getting older. Yet men see older women like Helen Mirren and Judi Dench as projecting confidence about their looks. Like most European women, the goal is to look well, rather than young, for one’s age, which means more time to relish and enjoy life.

We all know the celebs who have gone under the knife to fight aging. Of course, the professional makeup and the expensive clothes do help. But to me it’s those with a sense of humor about aging that win out. Joan Rivers was a favorite among comedians. She was not afraid to say it like it is. At one point, she told her audience that she was so nervous before an appearance that she had to change her diaper. She was not ashamed to say it like it is: older women often have bladder control problem.

Accepting that the war on aging is full of subtle battles we can’t win will prevent what I consider “aging anxiety” from intruding into our lives and looks. A sure way to project style as we age.

Germs

I do not suffer from germaphobia. I do shake hands with people and touch many things in the course of any one day when I step outside—gas pumps, elevator buttons, door handles, staircase railings, etc. However new technology has made me aware that the number of surfaces we need to touch keeps growing.

            My grandson was using his phone as we sat outside on a sunny day, and an array of points where his fingers had touched the screen were very visible. When I suggested that he might want to clean the screen he made the point that since he was the only one using his phone the marks I saw were simply his body oil. That made sense, but what about other tactile screens?

            As I was waiting in line at the ATM a short time later I began wondering how many fingers had touched that screen since it was last cleaned. Then it dawned on me that it probably had never been cleaned and would probably never be. Wow! Perhaps there’ll come a time when a person won’t be able to connect properly to the ATM because of the thickness of the fingerprints. That made me aware that I need to carry a small bottle of hand sanitizer whenever I plan to stop at the cash machine. Also a necessity in this age of self-serve cashiers at grocery stores and pharmacies.

            Talking of cash, I read an article not too long ago that pointed out that paper money is the dirtiest thing we encounter. I can see why. Bills are constantly changing hands and those hands are not always the cleanest they could be. It is believed that, in addition to being touched by fingers that have touched things we don’t want to know about, most cash has some residue of illicit drugs on its surface. Wow! And washing it is out of the question, I suppose.

            I grew up on a farm so dirt and mud and animals and hay were very much part of life. But we did have to wash our hands before eating. My mother made sure of that. However I believe farm life has helped my family be immune to allergies that affect many who grow up in mostly germ-free environments. Dirt is good as the saying goes. Case in point the Amish people have very low asthma rates because they’re exposed to barnyard dust. And today some care professionals are talking of boosting the immune systems of kids by exposing them to dirt microbes. My parents would simply say: Just let them play outside and get dirty.

I am convinced that a little dirt is good for everyone, however I draw the line at touching countless screens touched by countless fingers so cleaning my hands is a must more often than it used to be. I don’t see the need to be in contact with an excess amount of germs. Perhaps that’s the reason I punch the automatic door-opening button set up for wheelchairs when I go to the bank, the mall, or other buildings. Ever since I was following a fellow into the bank who coughed his germs onto the door handle I see not touching those as insurance against colds. 

            Especially now that the cold and flu season is silently and boldly pushing itself forward before I can get my flu shot.

A Perspective of Aging

“So, how old is God now?” my grandson casually asked one day. He couldn’t wait to get older, so everyone’s age—including the Almighty—was important. Of course, as the years pile on he may no longer welcome every birthday as eagerly.

Birthdays makes us aware of the passage of time like few things do especially when it speeds up like a car without brakes on the non-sunny side of that famous hill. However, how each age milestone is handled says a great deal about a person.

            The parachute jump by former U.S. President George Bush, the father, to celebrate his 90th birthday was newsworthy because of his former job, but it was impressive because of his age. I recently read a piece about a man, age 55, and his eight-year-old son who won a race at a local father-and-son day. It told me that the man became a father relatively late in life and that he keeps in shape.

 When I graduated from university, relatives and friends were quietly listening as names were called to receive that piece of parchment which gave credence to our years of toil. That is until the name of a woman well into her sixties was heard. The room broke out in thunderous applause. Her age made all the difference. She was proof that age is seldom a barrier to accomplishment.

            One of my aunts passed away at the age of 101. Living that long is a feat worthy of notice and it got me thinking. Her brother, my father, was not so lucky and died at the age of 55 as a result of an accident. At the time I was quite young and thought my father very old, yet now that I find myself older than my father ever was my view of age has undergone a profound change. I know I’m no longer a “young chick,” yet neither do I consider myself old.

            I am simply a grown-up.

            To me, every year downhill is a feather in my cap not something to shy away from. When I turned 50 I went on a trip around the world. Originally I was to go with a friend, but when she cancelled I went anyway. I bought my one-way ticket around the planet with many stops along the way on four different continents, and it was a most rewarding and enriching trip. I got to visit exotic locales and met some wonderful people. The memories will always be cherished. It was a daring thing for a not-so-young woman to do, and it proved—to me, anyway—that age is indeed just a number.

            Now older than my father I am proud to do things he never would have done because he lived in the pre my-age-does-not-stop-me era, like ride a bike, ski, play tennis, etc. Yet, I know I will continue to do these things for some time.

            I am inspired in part by another aunt who when she was 100 still considered herself not especially old. When I went to see her at the residence she called home when she was 95 I was told by the receptionist who looked at me as if I should have known, “It’s Wednesday. She’s at the yoga class.” While I’m sure this is not the norm for everyone in that age range, it beats the mindset that considers aging as a license to sit around and mope a less-than-perfect body.

            There are some benefits to getting older. For one thing, you stop worrying about what people think of you because you realize that they seldom do think about you. They are too busy with their own lives and concerns. You stop being impressed by such things as money and looks because you’re wise enough to understand that only the hearts and souls of people are enduring and endearing.

“So, are you younger or older than 100?” my age-conscious grandson asked me some years back on my birthday. In his mind I was a grandmother and therefore old because his granny, his great-grandmother, was nearing 100 and he heard the comments of the adults. Grandparents are grandparents, right?

            I can only hope that I inherited some of my family’s good genes for living well past what is still considered the norm, and that one day I’ll be able to tell my grandson that I am indeed older than 100.

            Especially if I can do it as we parachute jump together.

The Aging Mind

As we enjoy the mid-life journey, aging is blamed for things that may have nothing to do with the number of years we have lived. Case in point, a neighbor recently complained that her aging mind was acting up. “I can’t concentrate,” she whined. “I have to keep rereading the same page if I don’t want to forget what the book I’m reading is all about.” The more we talked, the more it became clear that her choice of books had not of late been judicious, and she was finding them dull and boring. Her problem had nothing to do with age, but rather with her mind not being fully utilized.

Memory lapses may have nothing to do with aging. “I keep forgetting things,” people say. “That’s what happens when you get old.” Instead of simply thinking that we’re on our way to dementia, why not try to assess—and correct—why we might be forgetting things.

Here are some examples to consider:

-- Are we absent-minded because we’re still trying to do ten things at the same time and overloading our thought process?

-- Are we bored with our lives and a little depressed? Why not try to make small changes that will brighten our outlook.

-- Are we preoccupied by a personal problem? When the mind keeps wandering to something that’s upsetting, it limits its ability to function properly.

-- Are we angry? Spending too much time focusing on anger rather than on trying to relieve its cause scatters thoughts. 

-- Are we grieving? Grieving the loss of a spouse, a friend, a pet, a job, or facing an empty nest, can play havoc with our ability to remember things. Time and a friendly ear might be needed to accept a new reality. 

-- Are we lonely? If family and friends have scattered we might be wallowing in loneliness which might well affect memory. It might be time to make new friends by joining a group to meet people with the same interests.

-- Are we disorganized? Some people think they’ll be able to remember things without jotting anything down. We all need reminders of medical and dental appointments, for example, since many are made weeks if not months in advance and can be forgotten at any age. An agenda can keep track of things we must do—big things and small things as well.

           Now, what was I suppose to do this afternoon?

 

 

 

 

AFFECTIVE COMPUTING

Here comes the future!

You think only your spouse or the dog can detect if you are in a lousy mood? Think again! Computer will soon be able to detect and appropriately respond to your state of mind.

            Affective computing, also known as AC, is an area concerned with gathering data from faces, voices and body language to measure human emotions. An important business goal of AC is to build human-computer interfaces that can offer a variety of applications. For example, AC programming can help physicians who deal with patients remotely to quickly understand a patient's mood or look for signs of depression.
            AC uses a computing device to gather cues about a person’s emotional state from a variety of sources other than facial expressions such as muscle tension, posture, hand and shoulder gestures, speech patterns, heart rate, pupil dilation and body temperature.

            So if I understand this correctly even if I smile to my boss to hide the fact that I had a bit too much to drink at lunch because I can’t stand her, her computer will sell me out? In other words we are entering an age where secrecy about personal views and feelings will be a thing of the past! Food for thought, don’t you think?

            I feel for the future of mankind. Having some small measure of control over what I may choose to show the world has always been sacred as far as I am concerned. If that is taken away, won’t we become merely fodder for machines? That is truly scary.

            How far will this new world go before people dare to revolt??