Musings on Aging

An older gentleman had severe hearing problems for some time. When he consulted a specialist he was fitted for a set of hearing aids with which he could hear perfectly. A month later the doctor commented: “Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.” The man replied: “Oh, I haven’t told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to conversations. I’ve changed my will three times!”

Hospitals require a wheelchair for patients being discharged. When a young nurse found an older man dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, she told him she would help him. He replied that he didn’t need any help to leave the hospital. After the nurse insisted that rules were rules, he reluctantly let her wheel him to the elevator. On the way down, when the nurse asked him if his wife was meeting him, he said: “I don’t know. She’s still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown.”

“Why did you decide to go back to college?” a woman in her eighties was asked. She replied: “I’m here to meet a rich husband and have a couple of kids.”

An older woman had to make a speech at a banquet. After being introduced she stepped up to the podium where she dropped her three-by-five cards on the floor. A little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said: “I’m sorry I’m so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me!”

Words to live by:

We make a Living by what we get, we make a Life by what we give.

Growing older is mandatory, growing up is optional. There are many people walking around who are dead and don’t even know it! There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.

Aging does not require any talent, practice or ability. The idea is to grow older by always finding opportunity in change.