On Worrying
Most of us are fascinated by what the future might hold. We want to know what will happen to us, to our loved ones, to the world. It’s no wonder seers of all stripes are so popular. Their predictions rarely hold true, and those that do are usually generalities that anyone could have predicted.
I think we waste a lot of time by worrying about the future – and the past – when we should concentrate on the present. Despite a few physical problems an older relative of mine believes that worrying about the future weakens the mind’s effort to make the most of today.
Worry is indeed ageing. It robs us of vitality as our mind whirls around and around the same problem for days -- and nights. It serves no useful purpose because it doesn’t change things. For instance, we may worry that the decision an adult child has taken will lead to future problems, but worrying about it is useless. I believe that outside of making our opinions known and providing the rationale for our thinking, worry will not benefit the child. It will only affect our sense of well-being. Those who, like my aged relative, are believers find that at such time, letting go and letting God is the answer.
Changing a mindset of a lifetime of worry habit is not always easy, but it can be done. When I am tempted to worry about whatever is happening – or I believe will happen – in my life, I sit quietly and meditate. At first, it was very difficult. My mind kept wandering to the problem I was attempting to ignore, but I stuck with it. On especially difficult days, I meditate several times in short sessions, and now reach a level when I can really let go.
Some people are put off by the word meditation. They equate it to something Buddhists or Indian gurus do, not something simple that anyone can practice. There are many books on meditation, but it is really quite simple. It’s only a manner of concentrating on something neutral or positive to clear the mind of negative thoughts. It is as simple as focusing on your breathing. When your mind wanders back to your worries, you guide it back to refocus on your breathing. Or you can close your eyes and let your mind stroll through a beautiful garden or fly above a mountain blanketed in freshly fallen snow, whatever you find peaceful. Starting with just a few minutes a day and increasing the time little by little does negate worry.
When you train yourself to let go of useless thoughts and worry, you see a difference in the way you approach life. As someone said we cannot direct the wind, but we can indeed adjust our sails. And Mark Twain observed: “I am an old man and I have known a good many troubles, but most of them have never happened.”
