On Worrying
Most of us are fascinated by what the future might hold. We want to know what will happen to us, to our loved ones, to the world. It’s no wonder seers of all stripes are so popular. Their predictions rarely hold true, and those that do are usually generalities that anyone could have predicted.
Like many people I have succumbed to the promise of knowing the future by consulting a medium who claims to communicate with spirits. A few of the things I was told were mesmerizing and did happen as predicted. The problem was that the rest was all conjecture, so there was no way to sift through it all and be assured of what would or would not be.
I think we waste a lot of time by worrying about the future – and the past – when we should concentrate on the present. A relative who celebrated her 98th birthday at the time of this writing is an amazing person who has made a point of living her life in the present. Despite a few physical problems her mind is as sharp as a tack. She believes that worrying about the future weakens the mind’s effort to make the most of today. She relies on God to take care of things in His own fashion.
Worry is indeed ageing. It robs us of vitality as our mind whirls around and around the same problem for days -- and nights -- at a time. It serves no useful purpose because it doesn’t change things. For instance, we may worry that the decision an adult child has taken will lead to future problems, but worrying about it is useless. I believe that outside of making our opinions known and providing the rationale for our thinking, worry will not benefit the child. It will only affect our sense of well-being. Those who, like my aged relative, are believers find that at such time, letting go and letting God is the answer.
Changing a mindset of a lifetime of worry habit is not always easy, but it can be done. When I am tempted to worry about whatever is happening – or I believe will happen – in my life, I sit quietly and meditate. At first, it was very difficult. My mind kept wandering to the problem I was attempting to ignore, but I stuck with it. On especially difficult days, I mediate several times in short sessions, and I have now reached a level when I can really let go.
Some people are put off by the word meditation. They equate it to something Buddhists or Indian gurus do, not something simple that anyone can practice. There are many books on meditation, but it is really quite simple. Meditation means concentrating on something neutral or positive to clear the mind of negative thoughts. It is as simple as focusing on your breathing. When your mind wanders back to your worries, you guide it back to refocus on your breathing. Or you can close your eyes and let your mind stroll through a beautiful garden or fly above a mountain blanketed in freshly fallen snow, whatever you find peaceful. Start with just a few minutes a day, increasing the time little by little to feel refreshed and negate worry.
When you train yourself to let go of useless thoughts and worry, you see a difference in the way you approach life. As someone said we cannot direct the wind, but we can indeed adjust our sails. Mark Twain said it best: “I am an old man and I have known a good many troubles, but most of them have never happened.”
Sunday, September 7 is Grandparents’ Day. Let’s spread the word!!
